Stating that there is no such thing as the “gay lifestyle” likely brings one of two reactions: disagreement or curiosity. If yours is the latter, great! Let’s unpack this together.
It’s vital to point out the operative word here – “the” – which infers a predominant, universal way of living.
“The gay lifestyle” is most often used disparagingly and based on stereotyped behaviors. Yet many LGBTQ+ folks lead responsible, moral, productive lives. Generalizations to the contrary are not based on real-lived experiences and aspirations of LGBTQ+ people.
Simply put, stating there is “the straight lifestyle” makes about as much sense as the gay one.
As well, there’s no such thing as “the gay agenda” (another dated, disrespectful expression). This has been used to describe the advocacy of cultural acceptance of non-heterosexual orientations and relationships, and primarily used as anti-LGBTQ rhetoric.
If there were a universal “gay agenda”, it would be to simply live their lives just as other folks do.
Words and paradigms matter. When they hurt more than heal, let us change them. To love your LGBTQ+ neighbor, it helps to see us as we truly are – just like you.
